I wish I had her life

So, yesterday was a grouchy Monday. I talked with Ricky after the girls got in bed to try to articulate my feelings of the day.  Words like "frustrated" and "isolated" were at the top of the list. After going to part time last year, and coveting the life of a SAHM (stay at home mom) I am now facing the struggles that I used to scoff at. I thought to myself, "I would never feel that way if I got to stay home with my girls! I would be so grateful that nothing would get to me! Every day will be filled with baking, and book reading, and playing games and enjoyment!"

That's not real life. After 12 weeks of maternity leave, I have learned all too well the real frustrations of a SAHM. My kids wake up grouchy. (Seriously, like almost every single day!) My kids are demanding. My kids don't get along very often without the help of a referee. My kids can be selfish, and have attitudes and be straight up liars. Mommies, though quite resiliant, can only handle so much of their shenanigans. 

So last night I was discussing with Ricky what I could do to ensure this day is fun. We discussed things like taking them to the Library to work on our school stuff, even maybe the splash pad? (but come on its 115 and i have a little baby!) When the time came to wake up this morning and take Ricky to work so I would have the car, I could. not. get. up. I almost then just accepted defeat for the day. The girls woke up in their usual bad moods, starting of their first words of the morning by yelling at each other. We had some breakfast and the girls asked to watch a movie. Of course, the rule is they have to agree on a movie. They picked one they've seen at least 78 times "Princess and the Popstar" and I thought, I can tolerate that!

Have you seen it? Its actually pretty good! Its based on the Mark Twain book "Prince and the Pauper." Well, the opening song is a duet sung by the Princess Tori and the Popstar Kiera, singing "I wish I had her life." They both thought their life would be so much better if they were in the other's positiion. All their troubles would go away! The stress of the life that they were in would be alleviated if they were really living someone else's life. My jaw litterally dropped as this song from a Barbie movie resonated deep inside of my heart. God then reminded me, I need to have a heart like Paul's:

"I’ve learned by now to be quite content whatever my circumstances. I’m just as happy with little as with much, with much as with little. I’ve found the recipe for being happy whether full or hungry, hands full or hands empty. Whatever I have, wherever I am, I can make it through anything in Christ who makes me who I am." (Philippians 4:11-13 MSG)

There's not much more to say after that! ... except to just carry on with my day with this at the fore-front of my mind and being the anchor to my easily swayed heart.

PS We're in better moods now ;)

Day Twenty Two (a little late)

(Emiko, Jovee, & Bella)

174. Yessssssterday, I was thankful for having such a busy day of celebrations that I didn't even have time to write this!! We ran around all morning getting ready for Jovee's Birthday Party. (She didn't even notice the chocolate donut I promised her that we didn't have time to get!)

175. Party supplies (despicable me theme... MINIONS!) and 

176. A fun store bought cake we decorated ourselves (thanks to ABC cake decorating just blocks from our house!)

(This was the only picture I got! Thankfully my mom snapped a few!)

177. Not having to worry about her dairy and soy allergies! (Birthday cakes have always been a pain to work around those allergies and now she has grown out of them!!!!)

(Chompin' on some pizza and wings, rockin' her minion shirt!!) nomnomnom

178. All our friends and family that came to celebrate with us! We got to see grandparents and great-grandparents and cousins and good friends we see all them time and good friends we haven't seen in forever... So blessed!

Cake time!

(So'oh holding Lucia. She's the matriarch of the family and holds all the babies. We just love her!)

179. My mom was there. I don't even have a picture of her because she was the one taking all the pictures! It hit me for the first time yesterday that earlier this year she was very very VERY close to going to Heaven. She spent a month in the hospital, half of which they had not know what was wrong and kept sending her home, only to lead to an emergency surgery hours after they had discharged her for the 4th time thinking she was better. She spent more time as they drained her body of the infection that was spread all throughout. Things are ALMOST back to normal and she has another surgery to go before life can resume as it was before 2014 started ... But she was there with us, holding Lucia, bringing the traditional birthday balloons, helping fold all the tissue paper to be reused for another present (best idea ever!) and that is something I'm really thankful for. 

180. Dinner party!! Yes. Yes I did throw two birthday parties in one day!! We had some friends and family over for my sister in law's birthday. I made baked ziti, garlic bread and brownies. It was a super yummy night and it was so nice to celebrate my "Seester" who has grown up so much since I first entered this family when she was 15. She's getting married!? And their checking out apartments!? And shopping for curtains!!!?? It's just so fun to see them excited and preparing for married life as Ricky and I remember when that was us... Picking out items for our home, signing our first lease, me, having to learn to drive a manual transmission (that I now love!) Even remembering that feeling when we got home from our honeymoon, and all them family was over to open gifts and eat pizza, and when they left, feeling  so giddy and surreal that I didn't have to go home!? This is OUR home now!? It's just a beautiful thing. 

181. Staying up late with them to talk about all that stuff!! Marriage counseling... Wedding plans... Apartment searching... I'm just so excited for this new chapter in my Seester's life :) ... And the girls are super excited they can start calling him. "Uncle Bran Bran!" Haha!

Day twenty one

173. Today I'm thankful for this:

http://familyshare.com/the-important-thing-about-yelling

It was a rough boring frustrating day. I needed that. 

Day Twenty

Tonight was a crazy night! So I hate to hurry but here's what I'm thankful for today...  

My sweet little seester (who's birthday is today) got ENGAGED!!!!!! 

167. Thankful for Elayna's birthday! I'm so glad to have her as a seester!!!

168. They're getting MARRIED!!! We're so excited and thankful to welcome Brandon into our family!!!

(accidnetal twinzies)

(SO PRETTY!!! )

169. Thankful for the time I got to spend with my Mother-in-Law, Rose, doing her nails for her!  Which also leads me to the next one

170. I'm now a Jamberry Nails Consultant! I'm super excited about it! Its going and already has been so much fun!

These are Kiss Me Ombre which you can buy here: http://totallyadorbs.jamberrynails.net/product/kiss-me-ombre#.U60O1Hm9LCQ

and these are Swiss Dot and Siesta Jamberry Juniors which you can buy here:

http://totallyadorbs.jamberrynails.net/product/swiss-dot--siesta#.U60PHnm9LCQ

171. Might seem random, but I really REALLY love when cheese is shredded skinny or fine or whatever this is called. No it doesn't taste different, its just better. mmmmmmm

172. ... and since I'm going in reverse order, I am really thankful for the time I got to spend coloroing birthday cards for Aunty Bug this morning with Miss Charlemaine.

Day Nineteen

I have so much to be thankful for today and I'm tempted to sum it all up with a bunch of pictures... but that is the opposite of my goal with this list!!! I know I will miss a million things about this day, but here are my thanks...

151. Woke up with all of our downstairs decorated in red streamers and balloons. Ricky's dad, "Papa Richard," decorated for Jovee's birthday after taking Rose to work at 4:30am today! What a great grandpa! We are so blessed with our family!

152. All the smiles from this girl today. Miss Jovee June is a happy little girl, except for when she wakes up and you don't immediately get her a drink of milk. Well, this morning, Charlee woke her up at 5:56am "JOVEE WAKE UP ITS YOUR BIRTHDAY!!!" o.m.g go back to bed. So, I got birthday princess her almond milk in her favorite Cat in the Hat tumbler, and we all FIVE snuggled back into bed for a few while Charlee and Jovee watched Pirate Fairy on Netflix (153 &154 for Tink and Netflix) When is was over, we had a little birthday photoshoot and we laughed a lot. Its really hard to switch from holding up 3 fingers for 365 days to holding up 4!! She has the best laugh ever!! (155)

156. Daddy got to spend the day with us!!!!

157. starbucks (duh) ps Jovee does not like Hazelnut lattes!

158. Niva, Jovee's first super cute Mooshka doll! She's been wanting one since her friend Emiko's birthday in February! (Mooshka Dolls even regrammed her on instagram! She was pretty excited about that!)

 159. Pump It Up! How can we NOT be thankful for an indoor arconditioned play place!!

160. PPP! We love our Peter Piper Pizza! MMMMMMMMMM

161. Daddy helping us make cupcakes while I fed Lucia.

(Jovee was very particular we use every type of sprinkle we had... including the Christmas sprinkles)

162. Dance Parties! and 

163. Birthday Pom Poms!

164. New Tattoos! Jovee got a rose with Lucia's name on it.

165. Praying together as a family. I know I know my eye's weren't closed... but its a moment I really wanted to capture. Birthday prayers are always a special thing in the Carrillo Home.

166. The first day of my Jovee June's 4th year! In some ways she is so big and in others, still so little... and we love her a ton!

Favorite Color: Red

Favorite Song: Two of a Kind by Perma

Favorite Person: "Mommy, I mean Daddy" (hahaha)

Favorite Food: sushi

Favorite thing about today: Nick Jr friends "called her" to say happy birthday. "They ARE real, they called mom's cell and they live in Mexico" .... hahaha!

Thank You, Lord for this wonderful celebration of a day! . . .  and we get to do another one tomorrow with Aunty Elayna!!!!

Day eighteen

As this list gets longer I think am I being repetitive? Truly, I am thankful for these things that seem to be every day reaccuring because I know that I will not always have these days. Kids will turn to teens... baby snuggles will become harder to catch as the toddler phase approaches... Work will need to be done... School work will start up full fledged... Life will change and I know it will change so much faster than we really expect it too. Then I read this in Ann Voskamps One Thousand Gifts and it spoke clearly what my heart has been thinking ... So this the list continues...

"Gratitude for the seemingly insignificant - a seed - this plants the giant miracle..." 

-Ann Voskamp in One Thousand Gifts

THANKS # 142 Celebration that Lucia is already two months old! What a sweet little lady we've been given! 

THANKS #143 The up and down motion of Lucia's belly as she sleeps 

THANKS #144 lots and lots and lots of snuggles today 

THANKS #145 freshly bathed baby skin 

THANKS #146 a big old playful mess! Mickey, and Spongebob, Barbies, and a tea party all in one big glorious evening mess. 

THANKS #147 Medicine... As I was battling a bad migraine today. 

THANKS #148 Little Girl Snaps- they just learn and they're so proud of themselves. 

THANKS #149 Tokyo love for Lucia. He's so cute as he comes up and sniffs her head and she's sleeping in my arms. He's a good kitty. 

THANKS #150 Hearing the girls through the baby monitor pray for others voluntarily as they go to sleep. 

Day Seventeen

THANKS #133 another day home with my girls that we can stay in pajamas all day long and play. 

THANKS #134 ... Photo shoot!! Charlee was "taking pictures" of Lucia and Lucia was loving it!

She took some pictures of us too!

Say cheese!!

Jovee posing!

THANKS #135 ... Jovee shared some of her fruit roll up with me!! Just rolled some up and handed it to me!! Such a sweetheart! This was a special treat they waited all day for!

THANKS #136 ... Homemade latte. I needed this. It was so so good. I'll probably have another tomorrow!

THANKS #137 homemade vanilla spice coffee cafe! Mmm I love baking!!

Recipe here... Just added pumpkin pie spice, more sugar than it asked for, and a splash of vanilla mmmmmmm

http://www.mandysrecipeboxblog.com/2009/09/quick-coffee-cake.html?m=1

THANKS #138 more Jovee selfies 

THANKS #139 I love how cute Charlee is... SO super into Finding Bigfoot! She didn't even want to go to the bathroom because she didn't want to miss anything!

THANKS #140 Ricky got Jovee to stop picking her nose. She always asks if she has a bloody nose because Charlee gets them all the time (I think she secretly wants one). Ricky "called the paramedics" and they "headed on their way" to help fix her bloody nose. She was really upset!! Ricky "called the paramedics back" and Jovee had to tell them on the phone she promises not to pick her nose anymore. Hopefully, the nose picking has stopped!!! 

THANKS #141 two of my three sweet babies are sleep in their beds. Thank You God ;)